Stealing Daddy's Money

Filed in archive Kids on July 1, 2008

Photo courtesy of iStockphoto, Grzegorz Oleksa

My 6-year-old son recently stole his first wad of cash from me. I had left $40 out in a place that was actually above his eye level, but he saw the bills from a short distance away and climbed up to get them. To his credit, he believes in sharing, so he gave one of the Twenties to his sister. She promptly told on him.

"I wish I'd never done it!" he said through his tears, as his mother and I tried to look grave and suppress our laughter. Not that I think stealing my money is a minor offense, but his self punishment, the gnashing of teeth and rolling on the bed crying his eyes out, was much more psychic pain than either of his parents could've or would've been inclined to inflict.

"Are you ever going to do that again?" I asked.

"No!" he sobbed.

"OK. Then lets be done with it. I believe you."

"Waaaaah!!!!!"

In the end I had to comfort my thieving child instead of punishing him, by telling him the story of when I filched some of my brother's paper route money for a while, only caught when my parents started to wonder where I was getting all those half dollars. (I miss the half dollar, by the way.)

Parenting is not easy, but luckily there are enough ridiculous moments like these to balance out the tedium and whining and refereeing that comes with the territory.