Look in the Mirror. Now Slap Yourself. Hard.

Filed in archive General on November 17, 2006

From Walter Updegrave's Money mag advice column:

Question: My wife and I are self-employed. In addition to a mortgage of just under $400,000, we have a home equity line of credit on which we've borrowed $41,000, credit-card debt of $25,000, plus two car loans.

Servicing all this debt is preventing us from saving enough for retirement. We're thinking of refinancing our mortgage so we can pay off the other debt, but I'm wondering whether this is just robbing Peter to pay Paul. What should I do here? - Peter L., Portland, Oregon

Updegrave answers very nicely, but here's what he said in layman's terms, or at least in my terms:

"WTF? $400,000 mortgage, $41,000 home equity loan and $25,000 in credit card debt and you think the solution is to refinance your $^@ mortgage?

What is wrong with you two? You're obviously not making enough money to keep up with your jet-set lifestyle.

Here's what I want you to do. Look in the mirror. Now, say, "I will not spend more than I make" three times. Then slap yourself. Hard. Three times. Then repeat that whole process until you get it through your thick skull that refinancing a mortgage doesn't help you get out of debt.

Now, news flash: not only are you not saving for retirement, you're guaranteeing that you'll be in debt up to your eyeballs throughout your retirement and will likely have a heart attack and die at your grocery clerk job when you are 93, a job you had to take in order to finish off the last $250,000 of that mortgage that you never could pay off.

Come on, people, this isn't rocket science. If more is going out than is coming in, you're screwed.

Now, look in that mirror again. If you're feeling confused, slap yourself again.